The Big Bang - v - The Big Doughnut Theory MkII (or Long Sausage Roll Theory)

To Big Bang Theorists

(A Big Bang Theory Alternative or: Don’t believe everything you are told)

(To be read in conjunction with

"The Big Bang -v- The Big Doughnut Theory")

If doughnuts
Those with holes not jam
Will not fit your complex plan
Of Mighty Bang
Then I would suggest another twist
To draw within your mind just this:

A sausage roll without the sausage
Long and smooth
It’s pastry glossy

(So elongated doughnut it becomes)
(Hopefully more acceptable to your sums)

Through which galaxies
If pulled
They out the other end
Will fall
(Perhaps reduced to cosmic dust)
by
(Banging against the pastry crust)

Now if the structure of this roll
Was of one fabric
Totally whole
Galaxies could surely roam
It's outer features
Quite at home
Those features
Curved just like a dish
In or out
Just as you wish
Would bend dark space
Without the risk
Or need of gravity
(Upon which)
(Your crap theory does in part exist)

Now
When arriving at the other end
They’d fall back through the middle again
(Perhaps reduced to cosmic dust)
(By banging against the pastry crust)

So to recap:

After transit through the inner husk
(Note: It is just possible that this roll)
(Might need to extend slightly)
(Perhaps a bit more pastry )
(To allow some time for the cosmic dust)
(In transit down the inner husk)
(To re-form itself into the Universe )
(As we know it)
All this mixed up cosmic dust
Emerges
Tensioned
To the crust
Expanding
As the Universe
Thus:

So
Red shift you want
Red shift you get
Bending light we could forget
For
With a sausage roll
Of that size
It's more likely something
Wrong with your eyes

Thus the Universe
And all within
Is never
Ever
Required
Truly to begin
(A Much more sensible theory)

Just continued motion from end to end
With a little time to form again

ie:

Across the top and down the middle
What more do you need to solve the riddle?

So to all BB theorists this message I send
To be read twice without any bangs:

All beginnings are also an end
Repeat together: (ALL BEGINNINGS ARE ALSO AN END)

Of a previous state that was, until then
Repeat together: (OF A PREVIOUS STATE THAT WAS, UNTIL THEN)

So true beginnings we never will have
Repeat together: (SO TRUE BEGINNINGS WE NEVER WILL HAVE)

And trying to prove it will drive us all mad!
Repeat together: (AND TRYING TO PROVE IT WILL DRIVE US ALL MAD!)

So now

Have you digested that?

There was no beginning

Just a change

Or a step

The beginning?

You imagined

Then

Could not

Forget

_

Egal Bohen

Please now read:

The Big Bang -v- The Big Doughnut Theory MkIII (Or  - 'What happens when a Big Doughnut Spins' )